Gyroscopic Investing

I was thinking about taking a tube of gold coins with me on the train tomorrow so I can put them in my dad's safe. The problem is, there is no comfortable place to keep them on my person, and putting them in my bags would be unthinkable.
I'm probably not going to go through with it, but if you were going to transport a tube, how would you?

The trip to the train station is a very short one on foot, otherwise I'd take a cab. It's even closer than the walk to my local bank, although the bank route is relatively safer. (I'm in a nice neighborhood but in a city with a high crime rate). The destination is a much smaller town, and anyway I'll be picked up by car.

I guess my main concerns would be getting randomly held up before I reach the station -- I never have been -- or a security check at the train station ("Hey, what do we have here?") which would also be random. It's usually just dogs sniffing luggage for bombs, if anything. Usually nothing.

Am I overthinking this? I'm loving my ETFs tonight.

IMO, you're overthinking it.  Put the tube in your pocket.  Take reasonable care not be a random mugging victim.  Otherwise, if you aren't doing anything illegal, don't worry about it.

I agree, probably overthinking it.

You could put the tube in some nondescript container inside a carryon bag.  An empty water bottle or something.

You could transport one or two coins at a time over several trips to spread the risk out.

You could give up on the train and mail the coins with insured mail like coin dealers seem to do.

I appreciate the replies. I think I will probably just bring a few coins, as there are already some in the safe at my destination. (Never had to transport those). For the rest,  I could always diversify with different banks here in town.

Kevin, your third suggestion is also something that occurred to me. Definitely something to consider for the future. I would be careful about that first option, though. There was a guy collecting donations by check in my neighborhood and his entire backpack was stolen. It was just paperwork -- data that he had painstakingly collected -- but of course the thief was not about to hang around while he removed apparently valueless items. Always back up. ;-) I guess he wasn't computer oriented.

I suppose that at home such a trick might work- an empty water bottle or a full tissue box. Of course, you are then risking the possibilty that your wife disposes of it. Maybe it's best to put them in an old pair of chaps.

You could sew them inside your leather chaps.    :D

I would just carry them in a zipper bag or something that would fit in my pocket and think about something else.

When I was trucking, I once had a $10 million piece of military aircraft avionics in the back of the truck.  I drove about the way I normally do.

Is that a tube of gold coins in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

MediumTex wrote: When I was trucking, I once had a $10 million piece of military aircraft avionics in the back of the truck.  I drove about the way I normally do.

Hmm, on the one hand, that's a bit harder to make off with. On the other, ten.million.dollars. I suppose carrying gold in your pocket doesn't feel like much, then. ;-)

jmourik wrote: Is that a tube of gold coins in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

Believe it or not, the idea of duct taping around my thigh near my groin did occur to me, but I'd probably just hurt myself, LOL.
Your goldmember avatar is more apt than ever before.

Put the tube of gold coins inside a long tube sock.  If someone tries to mug you, use it as a weapon.  BAM!!  Sock it to 'em.

You could also consider just moving them over one or two at a time, little by little.  Since it's your dad you'll be by there frequently enough anyway.  This has a few advantages:

• Easy to secure.  You could go shoes, neck wallet, whatever.  If you were robbed, once you forked over your wallet, it'd be a rare criminal indeed who'd say, "Now hand over the gold doubloons!  I know you've got em!"  If you are held up by Long John Silver, maybe.
• Several smaller risks rather than one bigger risk.  If something does happen to 1-2 coins it's distressing but an entire tube would be much worse.
• The fun of transporting perfectly legal "secret goods".  Your inner 10-year-old will love this.

The disadvantage is that you may feel like a weirdo or find the whole exercise tedious.

Honestly, you're going to be fine either way.  Think about what sounds more enjoyable and less stressful or annoying and go with it.  (It's also smartest to tell as few people as possible before you make such a trip.)

I've found whenever carrying large amounts of cash, putting it in your socks or shoes is usually safest.  If you are mugged, they will take your wallet but hopefully won't find the cash.  I'm not sure how easy it would be to hide gold coins in there, but if you had the plastic sleeves you could probably fit a few in each sock.

I recommend packing it neatly inside of a balloon or condom and then swallowing it.  This way, you don't have hastily ingest it if the border patrol catch on, which can be dangerous. 

How about a storage compartment in the heel of a pair of men's dress shoes?

There are also those leather jackets with tons of small zippered pockets that people usually use to store drugs.

Shoes and jackets are occasionally stolen by muggers, but rarely do they steal all of a person's clothes off their back.  So personally, I like the duct tape method the best.  Either around the thigh or midsection.

One word: Vaseline.

Seriously, is it any wonder why people started exchanging receipts from goldsmiths back in the day?

Everyone knows that the only way to transport gold is with a briefcase secured with handcuffs:



I'm sure that won't draw any attention.

For the record, I had very well protected nipples on this trip, as I put one in each shirt front pocket. Put the rest in my pants pocket, and all went well.

dualstow wrote:
For the record, I had very well protected nipples on this trip, as I put one in each shirt front pocket. Put the rest in my pants pocket, and all went well.

I stopped after reading the first few words and thought you had created some of those Janet Jackson Super Bowl nip covers out of one ounce coins, and I was about to proclaim that the coolest thing that had ever been done.

What you did sounds fine, though.  I'm glad it went well.