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I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:29 am
by Coffee
[Edit: I don't understand why they wouldn't just melt the gold into the lining of a walking cane? instead of... turning them into beads and shoving them up your ass??]
Men Arrested For Smuggling Gold In Rectums
Updated: Monday, 16 Jan 2012, 7:21 PM EST
Published : Monday, 16 Jan 2012, 9:24 AM EST
SEOUL, South Korea - South Korean customs officials say they have arrested eight men over a scheme to allegedly smuggle gold out of the country by hiding it in their rectums.
The Korea Customs Service said Monday the men allegedly transformed $260,000 in gold bars into small beads and smuggled them in their rectums to Japan two times in 2010 to avoid import taxes.
South Korea says Japanese custom officials caught the men on their second attempt and sent them home after imposing fines. Later, one of the suspects allegedly orchestrated an unsuccessful bid to smuggle gold bars from Mongolia to Hong Kong using a similar method.
Meanwhile, South Korean officials gathered evidence against them at home. They say the suspects recently admitted to the smuggling after initial denials.
Read more:
http://www.myfoxdc.com/dpp/news/offbeat ... z1jjYT0ZiM
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:36 am
by moda0306
This is NOT how HB recommended to diversify internationally.
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:42 am
by moda0306
The human rectum has been the #1 victim of taxes and drug laws... and that's before these guys even get into prison!!
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:47 am
by stone
This reminded me of Mr Garrison's invention in South Park:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Entity_(South_Park)
"Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison, tired of the inefficient and frustrating airline check-ins, decides to invent his own vehicle. Inspired by watching singer Enrique Iglesias' sexualized singing on TV and by gyroscopes, he invents the gyroscope-powered monowheel "It." "It" can go up to two hundred miles per hour, gets three hundred miles to the gallon, and is an all-around better mode of travel. The only problem is that "It" is controlled by an uncomfortable method; using four "flexi-grip handles" that somewhat resemble erect penises; two held in the hands, one in the mouth, and a fourth handle which is inserted into the anus. It also transpires that the vehicle can be operated with buttons too, making the phallus-like controls an unnecessary discomfort. Garrison invites many important investors such as Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Yasmine Bleeth to see how "It" works. Despite this unorthodox control mechanism (which is uncomfortable to everyone except Garrison and women), "It" is still considered better than the airlines and Garrison is a smashing success."
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:52 am
by Lone Wolf
Apropos of nothing, I was wondering if any of you gentlemen would accept a collect call from South Korea to bail me out of jail? I've had a little "travel mishap" rebalancing my Permanent Portfolio.
Anyway, hilarious story. Hey, a little math: At current prices, that's about 168.18 ounces of gold (
http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=%2 ... old+ounces)
This scheme has 8 participants, yielding >21 ounces per "gold storage facility". If you know what I mean by "gold storage facility". And I mean rectum.
I don't know about you, but I find travel stressful enough without nearly 1.5 pounds of precious metals in my "cargo hold".
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 10:56 am
by AdamA
Coffee wrote:
[Edit: I don't understand why they wouldn't just melt the gold into the lining of a walking cane? instead of... turning them into beads and shoving them up your ass??]
Live a little, Coffee.
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:05 am
by Coffee
stone wrote:
This reminded me of Mr Garrison's invention in South Park:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Entity_(South_Park)
"Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison, tired of the inefficient and frustrating airline check-ins, decides to invent his own vehicle. Inspired by watching singer Enrique Iglesias' sexualized singing on TV and by gyroscopes, he invents the gyroscope-powered monowheel "It." "It" can go up to two hundred miles per hour, gets three hundred miles to the gallon, and is an all-around better mode of travel. The only problem is that "It" is controlled by an uncomfortable method; using four "flexi-grip handles" that somewhat resemble erect penises; two held in the hands, one in the mouth, and a fourth handle which is inserted into the anus. It also transpires that the vehicle can be operated with buttons too, making the phallus-like controls an unnecessary discomfort. Garrison invites many important investors such as Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Yasmine Bleeth to see how "It" works. Despite this unorthodox control mechanism (which is uncomfortable to everyone except Garrison and women), "It" is still considered better than the airlines and Garrison is a smashing success."
You've got to wonder what kind of drugs those guys take to come up with this stuff, eh?
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 11:12 am
by craigr
That was me. I was working out some of the details for the Geographic Diversification chapter in the upcoming book.
Re: I Heard These Guys Were Permanent Portfolio Investors?
Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2012 1:47 pm
by AdamA
I fly a lot, and often think of that episode while going through airport security. I would be delighted if such a vehicle existed, in spite of the mechanism by which it functions.