Gyroscopic Investing

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Sun Apr 26, 2020 6:42 pm 31 and watching all my friends be in multi-year enriching relationships and getting married. I can't even get a girl to hang around for 2 months. I'm seriously starting to wonder if there's something wrong with me.

FWIW Smithy I was 34 when I finally found the right one for me. 8 years later and it's hard to believe life our lives somehow connected -- any younger and there's no way we would have run into each other, nor been as compatible (likely wouldn't have even talked to the other person!)

Looking back, I see all the time before as "practice". You learn a lot about yourself through "failed" relationships -- what you value in a partner, what gets old over time. And you learn who you are during the in-between times as you seek happiness through yourself vs someone else.

One suggestion, if you're not already doing it -- video chat with friends. I'd not done the video thing before the who 'rona thing, but it's a much better connection than email or IM or just voice chat. Heck, have a beer together virtually!

drumminj wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 9:32 am

FWIW Smithy I was 34 when I finally found the right one for me. 8 years later and it's hard to believe life our lives somehow connected -- any younger and there's no way we would have run into each other, nor been as compatible (likely wouldn't have even talked to the other person!)

Looking back, I see all the time before as "practice". You learn a lot about yourself through "failed" relationships -- what you value in a partner, what gets old over time. And you learn who you are during the in-between times as you seek happiness through yourself vs someone else.

One suggestion, if you're not already doing it -- video chat with friends. I'd not done the video thing before the who 'rona thing, but it's a much better connection than email or IM or just voice chat. Heck, have a beer together virtually!

Mid thirties does seem like a good age to commit. Old enough to have gained some wisdom, young enough to really enjoy the bulk of the rest of your life.

It's been a day since the breakup. Maybe my wanting to get married is just the influence of other people settling down... and perhaps I really need to think about what's best for myself. Mindlessly aping what other people are doing doesn't seem to lead to good results in life in generally.

My two best friends -- one of them is married and the other is engaged. They're both the same age as me. When we were in our twenties they both found girls they clicked with. Both of their relationships have been going on near a decade now. I was just dating, having fun, and thinking to myself "Pffffft! Why settle down when I can have so much fun!" It did seem so sensible at the time.

Honestly, I'm not so sure where I stand now.

P.S. I've said this before, but when I do get married you guys are all invited.

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:15 am Mid thirties does seem like a good age to commit. Old enough to have gained some wisdom, young enough to really enjoy the bulk of the rest of your life.

It's been a day since the breakup. Maybe my wanting to get married is just the influence of other people settling down... and perhaps I really need to think about what's best for myself. Mindlessly aping what other people are doing doesn't seem to lead to good results in life in generally.

My two best friends -- one of them is married and the other is engaged. They're both the same age as me. When we were in our twenties they both found girls they clicked with. Both of their relationships have been going on near a decade now. I was just dating, having fun, and thinking to myself "Pffffft! Why settle down when I can have so much fun!" It did seem so sensible at the time.

Honestly, I'm not so sure where I stand now.

It sounds like you're turning into a Modern Western Female.

P.S. I've said this before, but when I do get married you guys are all invited.

Give me time and I'll convince you otherwise

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:57 am
It sounds like you're turning into a Modern Western Female.

P.S. I've said this before, but when I do get married you guys are all invited.

Give me time and I'll convince you otherwise

LMAO. It's 2020. I'm ready to embrace my feminine side.

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:58 am

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 10:57 am
It sounds like you're turning into a Modern Western Female.

P.S. I've said this before, but when I do get married you guys are all invited.

Give me time and I'll convince you otherwise

LMAO. It's 2020. I'm ready to embrace my feminine side.

Are you ready to have a party with Krieg? I’m thinking it would be a real blast. But I am not sure about sharing a jail cell with y’all.

Mountaineer wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:09 pm Are you ready to have a party with Krieg? I’m thinking it would be a real blast. But I am not sure about sharing a jail cell with y’all.

No, I'm not ready, but I think it's what I need.

I've never been arrested. My egress is on point.

And most of my friends have had their weddings in rural areas with low police presence.

The next girl is going to be the one. I've got a good feeling about it.

Yes, totally just shitposting... or at least mostly just shitposting.

LOL, doubt it

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 7:22 pm LOL, doubt it

lol

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Sun Apr 26, 2020 7:45 pm Confucius say, "Good thing come to those who master wait."

Confucius also said, "Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 7:09 pm The next girl is going to be the one. I've got a good feeling about it.

In that case, bet it all on black.

CT-Scott wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 7:37 pm

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Sun Apr 26, 2020 7:45 pm Confucius say, "Good thing come to those who master wait."

Confucius also said, "Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.

At least I made up mine when I was inebriated.

CT-Scott, the racist wrote:

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Mon Apr 27, 2020 7:09 pm The next girl is going to be the one. I've got a good feeling about it.

In that case, bet it all on black.

Goddamn that's a problematic quote.

Still not eating and sleeping quite right, but at least i'm not sleeping during the day.

I got a small windfall cheque in the mail yesterday, and that fully covers the funds I spent on video games. So, that's kind of nice.

I solved a postgresql database connection error in my latest app. So I also got something productive done. Woohoo!!

.

Second the suggestion for a virtual happy hour with a friend. A picture of pure contentment may help here too:
That's Charlie, an accomplished master at being happy on his own.

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Tue Apr 28, 2020 7:35 am Still not eating and sleeping quite right, but at least i'm not sleeping during the day.
...

Do you eat amazing Cantonese food at home? I think ochotona and I briefly mentioned 油條 once。 I only know the Mandarin pronunciation, youtiao, but if you put those characters into google images, you’ll know. Or, here’s a link for all the gweilo: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Youtiao

I’ve only had real Cantonese food a dozen times or so. It’s some of the best in the world, in my opinion. Now, as the U.S. discovers more authentic food from specific regions in China, Cantonese doesn’t have the novelty of being exotic anymore, but it’s just good.
——
Great photos, guys.

WiseOne,

What is the view in the window beyond Charlie? Is that an overcast condition by the Hudson River?

Cat grass on the window sill and courtyard garden outside the window. The brightness is mostly iPhone camera exposure, as the sky was overcast.

The blue tape is there because the window frame was broken by exterior work and it's leaking like a sieve. The replacement of course is delayed by the coronavirus lockdowns.

Speaking of which...if anyone is on prescription meds, you'd better check with your pharmacies about supply disruptions before you're close to running out. I should have realized this might happen because virtually all our pharmaceuticals are manufactured in China, but stupidly I assumed I'd be notified about it by the pharmacy or my MD. No such luck. It is no one's job to inform you of supply disruptions until you walk into the pharmacy and find out there's nothing to pick up, and they just shrug and tell you you're on your own, gotta find it someplace else.

Here's my monitor background. I took it.

That’s just grand.

I hope you have a peaceful day today.

Peace is the theme of today's Garage Theology, a very good brief message in troubled times for so many.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxC8VFcP6qQ

Hello everyone. Just an update. Learning from past experience, I cut off all contact with girl-down-the-street. Deleted her number, unfriended on Facebook, etc. I've pretty much just been focused on self-care lately. Remembering to take showers and not letting go of good diet and hygiene habits. I've been spending most of my time just playing video games to keep my occupied. Not in the mood for work.

She sent me an email...

I put you through a pretty terrible experience didn't I—I'm very sorry.

I just want you to know, for the record, that I loved being with you for the last couple of months. You're considerate and thoughtful and hilarious... I really enjoyed our dates. There were sudden changes in my family arrangements and I did something very stupid. I feel terrible for the way this ended. I clearly should not have been pursuing a relationship. I'm sorry. You deserve much, much, much better.

You do not need to reply, I just want to acknowledge that (before I killed it) this was the best dating experience I've had. You are one of the best men I've met. I'm so sorry that I put you through a bad experience.

This definitely tugged on some heart strings... I'm feeling a bit better now, but still kind of raw. I think I'm out of video game binge mode now though at least.

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Thu Apr 30, 2020 10:31 am Hello everyone. Just an update. Learning from past experience, I cut off all contact with girl-down-the-street. Deleted her number, unfriended on Facebook, etc. I've pretty much just been focused on self-care lately. Remembering to take showers and not letting go of good diet and hygiene habits. I've been spending most of my time just playing video games to keep my occupied. Not in the mood for work.

She sent me an email...

I put you through a pretty terrible experience didn't I—I'm very sorry.

I just want you to know, for the record, that I loved being with you for the last couple of months. You're considerate and thoughtful and hilarious... I really enjoyed our dates. There were sudden changes in my family arrangements and I did something very stupid. I feel terrible for the way this ended. I clearly should not have been pursuing a relationship. I'm sorry. You deserve much, much, much better.

You do not need to reply, I just want to acknowledge that (before I killed it) this was the best dating experience I've had. You are one of the best men I've met. I'm so sorry that I put you through a bad experience.

This definitely tugged on some heart strings... I'm feeling a bit better now, but still kind of raw. I think I'm out of video game binge mode now though at least.

That's a lot more (and better) than I would have expected. Good for her (and you).

Libertarian666 wrote: ↑Thu Apr 30, 2020 10:35 am
That's a lot more (and better) than I would have expected. Good for her (and you).

Thanks. I miss her.

Smith1776 wrote: ↑Thu Apr 30, 2020 10:38 am

Libertarian666 wrote: ↑Thu Apr 30, 2020 10:35 am
That's a lot more (and better) than I would have expected. Good for her (and you).

Thanks. I miss her.

Understandably.