Gyroscopic Investing

I saw a mountain lion, being a total dick, attacked some guy jogging in Colorado, who hit it with a rock and fucking strangled it to death with his bare hands. Some guys have all the luck.

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Thu Feb 07, 2019 4:06 pm I saw a mountain lion, being a total dick, attacked some guy jogging in Colorado, who hit it with a rock and fucking strangled it to death with his bare hands. Some guys have all the luck.

But srsly how badass is the rest of your life when THAT is what you're famous for...

But I shoot ONE FERAL CAT that was taking a shit in my garden, and I'M a monster.

Our (former) governor shot a coyote one time while on a walk with his dog. Strangling would have been more impressive.

MangoMan wrote: ↑Thu Feb 07, 2019 7:39 pm

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Thu Feb 07, 2019 6:15 pm But I shoot ONE FERAL CAT that was taking a shit in my garden, and I'M a monster.

If it had been a mountain lion, you would have gotten a pass. But only if you strangled it instead of shooting it.

If you want to play, learn the rules.

To be transparent, I shot it with a garden hose. It was walking, like a smug little son of a bitch, and was almost under my back deck when I nailed it right in the hip. It jumped five feet straight up in the air and then took off like a rocket. The next day, I swear this is true, I found that it had left me a headless mouse as an offering on my front porch. They now see me as a God.

Cougars have become a real problem in this area. Not too long ago, my dog treed a cub in a wooded area just outside of my house. I heard lots of big branches breaking, and my dog was going crazy at the base of the tree, leading me to believe that she had probably treed a small bear. I finally got my dog inside, and it was not more than 10 minutes later that I looked out the window and a huge mama lion came striding across the grass toward the tree.

Around here, cougars have pretty much decimated the deer population, and they've become very bold, coming right up to houses and snatching large dogs from front porches. The laws overwhelmingly protect the cougars, so you shoot one at the risk of doing jail time. Lots of heated political debate around here about the official stance on cougars, which, quite simply, is either that they're not here or that they didn't do it.

MangoMan wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:20 am

Maddy wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:56 am Cougars have become a real problem in this area.

Cougars are a problem here in the suburbs, too. My 30yo daughter's friends report that they can't find decent guys to date because 30ish guys are all consumed with 40-something divorcees.

Good one!

I never dreamed a thread about such a frustrating topic could be so entertaining. (Did anyone watch Arctic Wolf Pack on PBS the other day? Not entertaining, more like tragic. But very well done.

Mountaineer wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 10:08 am

MangoMan wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:20 am

Maddy wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:56 am Cougars have become a real problem in this area.

Cougars are a problem here in the suburbs, too. My 30yo daughter's friends report that they can't find decent guys to date because 30ish guys are all consumed with 40-something divorcees.

Good one!

(kriegsspiel (who else would it be?))
I found that it had left me a headless mouse as an offering on my front porch. They now see me as a God.

Mountaineer wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 10:08 am

MangoMan wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 8:20 am

Maddy wrote: ↑Fri Feb 08, 2019 7:56 am Cougars have become a real problem in this area.

Cougars are a problem here in the suburbs, too. My 30yo daughter's friends report that they can't find decent guys to date because 30ish guys are all consumed with 40-something divorcees.

Good one!

Light choking only, thank you.

Always keep a safe word.

THREE-YEAR-OLD BOY LOST IN WOODS 'HUNG OUT WITH A BEAR'

"Casey’s aunt Breanna Hathaway wrote: 'He said he hung out with a bear for two days. God sent him a friend to keep him safe. God is good. Miracles do happen.'"

Bears make better friends than mountain lions. They are sent from God, and they love honey. Mountain lions are pure evil and erupt fully formed from Satan's butthole.

Any questions?

Kriegsspiel wrote: ↑Fri Feb 15, 2019 11:46 am THREE-YEAR-OLD BOY LOST IN WOODS 'HUNG OUT WITH A BEAR'

"Casey’s aunt Breanna Hathaway wrote: 'He said he hung out with a bear for two days. God sent him a friend to keep him safe. God is good. Miracles do happen.'"

Bears make better friends than mountain lions. They are sent from God, and they love honey. Mountain lions are pure evil and erupt fully formed from Satan's butthole.

Any questions?

Bears: They've got Jesus in 'em.