When someone's opinion differs from yours...

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jalanlong
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When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by jalanlong » Thu Sep 17, 2020 1:46 pm

So these days we live in a world where 1) people feel the need to express their opinion on everything and 2) they have the tools to do it in a public forum.

So with this in mind,what do you guys do when you see that someone you are doing business with has expressed an opinion that doesn't necessarily just differ from yours but pretty much insults you directly? I personally hate cancel culture and the whole notion of constant culture wars where one side is punishing the other with boycotts etc when they don't agree with them on something.

However, I recently moved my money to a small, start-up bank that has really great rates, great products, excellent online platform etc. I love everything about their product. However, their CEO/Owner spends a huge amount of time on Twitter bashing Libertarians/Conservatives for their selfish, illogical positions but his tweets show that he knows very little about their actual positions. Why someone trying to get a start-up bank off the ground would insult a huge swath of prospective customers is a mystery but in any case, how do you guys handle things like this?

I happen to be one of those "freedom" loving people that he caricatures quite often. And as such I like living in a county where people can have differing opinions. He has his opinions on masks and I have mine for example. However, when he insults my position and characterizes someone who holds my position in a certain way, it makes it very hard for me to continue to want to give my money to him in a business transaction. Am I wrong?
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by stuper1 » Thu Sep 17, 2020 2:12 pm

It sounds like he's an idiot. Doesn't he realize that small business owners typically love liberty? Doesn't he want their business at his bank? People who mix business with politics are idiots, but there seem to be a lot of these people these days. You are certainly not wrong for feeling the way you do. You just have to make a business decision. Do you like his product enough to put up with his idiocy?
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by jalanlong » Thu Sep 17, 2020 2:30 pm

stuper1 wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 2:12 pm
It sounds like he's an idiot. Doesn't he realize that small business owners typically love liberty? Doesn't he want their business at his bank? People who mix business with politics are idiots, but there seem to be a lot of these people these days. You are certainly not wrong for feeling the way you do. You just have to make a business decision. Do you like his product enough to put up with his idiocy?
I have heard him on podcasts and when it comes to banking he has a lot of very good ideas and definitely knows his stuff. When it comes to politics..well he is in California and he is a young tech guy and I am sure he is swayed by the crowd. The posts are on his personal Twitter btw. Surprisingly throughout this year the bank has not made one post about current events.

As an example, he had a tweet on masks. Now if he just came out and said "I am in favor of wearing masks" then that is fine. That is his opinion. However his tweet was along the lines of can you believe Americans proclaiming their "right" not to wear a mask because of "freedom" as they get into a car registered to the state with a license issued by the state and buckling up a seat belt forced by law. Then does some laughing monkey emjois.

There was also a tweet about while America is burning you can vote for a Firehose (Biden) or a Molotov Cocktail (Trump) so choose wisely...
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by pp4me » Thu Sep 17, 2020 3:23 pm

I once closed my accounts at Bank of America when I saw photos of the executives sitting in luxury suites at the Super Bowl after they took bail out money from the government in the TARP program.

Don't think I'd do that just because of a difference in opinion however, especially when he's expressing it on his own twitter account and not the bank's. I would just ignore him unless he actually does something politically motivated that affects you.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by stuper1 » Thu Sep 17, 2020 4:19 pm

Maybe it's sort of like the people who put supposedly Christian symbols on their advertising. To me, that's just another form of virtue signaling, although many are very sincere I'm sure. I just ignore the symbols when I'm deciding whether to do business with them. I say this as a Christian myself, although my beliefs are quite different from most who would call themselves Christians and put the symbols on their advertising. Actually, if I'm being totally honest, if I have two companies to select from, and all other things being equal, I probably do pick the "Christian" company first in hopes that religious people will be more honest than non-religious. In the case of this guy's bank, all other things being equal, I would pick another bank, because he sounds like somebody who likes big government, and I don't trust big government, so I figure people who do support big government make worse business people.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by I Shrugged » Thu Sep 17, 2020 6:19 pm

jalanlong wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 2:30 pm
stuper1 wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 2:12 pm
It sounds like he's an idiot. Doesn't he realize that small business owners typically love liberty? Doesn't he want their business at his bank? People who mix business with politics are idiots, but there seem to be a lot of these people these days. You are certainly not wrong for feeling the way you do. You just have to make a business decision. Do you like his product enough to put up with his idiocy?
I have heard him on podcasts and when it comes to banking he has a lot of very good ideas and definitely knows his stuff. When it comes to politics..well he is in California and he is a young tech guy and I am sure he is swayed by the crowd. The posts are on his personal Twitter btw. Surprisingly throughout this year the bank has not made one post about current events.

As an example, he had a tweet on masks. Now if he just came out and said "I am in favor of wearing masks" then that is fine. That is his opinion. However his tweet was along the lines of can you believe Americans proclaiming their "right" not to wear a mask because of "freedom" as they get into a car registered to the state with a license issued by the state and buckling up a seat belt forced by law. Then does some laughing monkey emjois.

There was also a tweet about while America is burning you can vote for a Firehose (Biden) or a Molotov Cocktail (Trump) so choose wisely...
The thing is, most people on the left that I observe don't have any doubt that they are right, and that almost everyone agrees with them. I always saw it with teachers' unions. They couldn't understand how parents and taxpayers weren't supporting their strikes. They believe their own press clippings, as the saying goes.

I have friends on the right who do the same kind of stupid social media things that your guy is doing. They know that others disagree, they just want to push peoples' buttons, I think. I almost feel we have to view these social media nuisances with some amusement. I give a little extra slack to the younger ones who think they know it all but will find out differently over time.

As to continued patronage, I guess that's simply a personal decision. I like pro sports, and am not going to stop watching them because of BLM messages and such. I roll my eyes a lot, though. :) But I have friends who have dis-owned their favorite teams over it.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by vnatale » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:23 pm

If you had a serious medical issue that required surgery would you forego the definite most qualified surgeon
because his / her medical views were 100% opposite to yours and move on to the next most qualified one whose views were not so opposite to yours?

Vinny
Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by Xan » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:28 pm

vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:23 pm
If you had a serious medical issue that required surgery would you forego the definite most qualified surgeon
because his / her medical views were 100% opposite to yours and move on to the next most qualified one whose views were not so opposite to yours?

Vinny
I'm not sure how that's analogous here. This is more like, would you patronize a sandwich shop that makes okay sandwiches but insults you, or would you go to the other sandwich shop next door?
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by vnatale » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:34 pm

Xan wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:28 pm
vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:23 pm
If you had a serious medical issue that required surgery would you forego the definite most qualified surgeon
because his / her medical views were 100% opposite to yours and move on to the next most qualified one whose views were not so opposite to yours?

Vinny
I'm not sure how that's analogous here. This is more like, would you patronize a sandwich shop that makes okay sandwiches but insults you, or would you go to the other sandwich shop next door?
How is it not analogous? This started with the original poster stating that he really liked the product and would not like to leave it, implying leaving it would lead to taking an inferior product, not an equal one.

Therefore, in both cases it's a choice of either of choosing between a superior product / services with offensive political views or an inferior product / services with no offensive political views attached to them.

Vinny
Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by Xan » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:45 pm

vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:34 pm
Xan wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:28 pm
vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:23 pm
If you had a serious medical issue that required surgery would you forego the definite most qualified surgeon
because his / her medical views were 100% opposite to yours and move on to the next most qualified one whose views were not so opposite to yours?

Vinny
I'm not sure how that's analogous here. This is more like, would you patronize a sandwich shop that makes okay sandwiches but insults you, or would you go to the other sandwich shop next door?
How is it not analogous? This started with the original poster stating that he really liked the product and would not like to leave it, implying leaving it would lead to taking an inferior product, not an equal one.

Therefore, in both cases it's a choice of either of choosing between a superior product / services with offensive political views or an inferior product / services with no offensive political views attached to them.

Vinny
Because the stakes are much lower. This isn't life-or-death surgery.

Let me draw an analogy with your analogy. Suppose jalanlong had said "I like this sandwich shop, it's slightly better than the one next door, but the one next door charges $4/sandwich and this one charges $40/sandwich. Which one should I go to?"

You might reply with "Would you forego the most qualified surgeon if he wanted $4000 for a procedure that some other surgeon could do for $400?"

Such a response wouldn't apply. This is not a medical procedure. It's either a sandwich, or a bank.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by vnatale » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:48 pm

Xan wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:45 pm
vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:34 pm
Xan wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:28 pm
vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:23 pm
If you had a serious medical issue that required surgery would you forego the definite most qualified surgeon
because his / her medical views were 100% opposite to yours and move on to the next most qualified one whose views were not so opposite to yours?

Vinny
I'm not sure how that's analogous here. This is more like, would you patronize a sandwich shop that makes okay sandwiches but insults you, or would you go to the other sandwich shop next door?
How is it not analogous? This started with the original poster stating that he really liked the product and would not like to leave it, implying leaving it would lead to taking an inferior product, not an equal one.

Therefore, in both cases it's a choice of either of choosing between a superior product / services with offensive political views or an inferior product / services with no offensive political views attached to them.

Vinny
Because the stakes are much lower. This isn't life-or-death surgery.

Let me draw an analogy with your analogy. Suppose jalanlong had said "I like this sandwich shop, it's slightly better than the one next door, but the one next door charges $4/sandwich and this one charges $40/sandwich. Which one should I go to?"

You might reply with "Would you forego the most qualified surgeon if he wanted $4000 for a procedure that some other surgeon could do for $400?"

Such a response wouldn't apply. This is not a medical procedure. It's either a sandwich, or a bank.
Yes, I agree the stakes are totally different.

But I'm trying to get at the principles involved.

If a principle is strongly held then it does not matter what the stakes are.

But if the principles start to bend when the stakes get higher were their really principles involved?

Or, maybe, I'm getting too deep with this??!!

Vinny
Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by jalanlong » Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:51 pm

vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:34 pm
Xan wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:28 pm
vnatale wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:23 pm
If you had a serious medical issue that required surgery would you forego the definite most qualified surgeon
because his / her medical views were 100% opposite to yours and move on to the next most qualified one whose views were not so opposite to yours?

Vinny
I'm not sure how that's analogous here. This is more like, would you patronize a sandwich shop that makes okay sandwiches but insults you, or would you go to the other sandwich shop next door?
How is it not analogous? This started with the original poster stating that he really liked the product and would not like to leave it, implying leaving it would lead to taking an inferior product, not an equal one.

Therefore, in both cases it's a choice of either of choosing between a superior product / services with offensive political views or an inferior product / services with no offensive political views attached to them.

Vinny
Well the stakes are not the same in eating an inferior sandwich vs choosing an inferior surgeon.

However, is it disingenuous of me to be angry at him for his social media diatribes when a) I chose to read them, he did not send them to me and b) I only follow him because he is a CEO of a startup bank. I dont vett everyone I do business with. I do not follow my dentist's tweets or my veterinarian's or my barber's. We get mad at the big companies doing the big virtue signaling but we never hold our local merchants to the same standards.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by Mark Leavy » Thu Sep 17, 2020 10:07 pm

jalanlong wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:51 pm

Well the stakes are not the same in eating an inferior sandwich vs choosing an inferior surgeon.

However, is it disingenuous of me to be angry at him for his social media diatribes when a) I chose to read them, he did not send them to me and b) I only follow him because he is a CEO of a startup bank. I dont vett everyone I do business with. I do not follow my dentist's tweets or my veterinarian's or my barber's. We get mad at the big companies doing the big virtue signaling but we never hold our local merchants to the same standards.
This was one of the better reads of the evening. Well thought through and a great demonstration of the process.
I'm a firm believer that we can answer our own questions once we throw them against the wall.

Mark
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by flyingpylon » Fri Sep 18, 2020 4:54 am

jalanlong wrote:
Thu Sep 17, 2020 9:51 pm
Well the stakes are not the same in eating an inferior sandwich vs choosing an inferior surgeon.

However, is it disingenuous of me to be angry at him for his social media diatribes when a) I chose to read them, he did not send them to me and b) I only follow him because he is a CEO of a startup bank. I dont vett everyone I do business with. I do not follow my dentist's tweets or my veterinarian's or my barber's. We get mad at the big companies doing the big virtue signaling but we never hold our local merchants to the same standards.
Just focus on things you can control. CEOs will come and go, you can ignore them for the most part. Unfollow the guy.

It sounds like you’re happy with the product. If that changes, make a switch. Or if you look around and find another option that’s just as good and comes without the baggage of an annoying CEO, make a switch.

Otherwise, just focus on the business transaction and whether it works for you. It creates a lot less stress.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by Maddy » Fri Sep 18, 2020 7:12 am

There are literally hundreds of opportunities each day to push back against tyranny. Each one of them represents an opportunity to "man up" and exercise some backbone. Minor displays of principle that don't require much in the way of personal sacrifice are easy--and ordinarily less meaningful in overall impact than the ones that require something of actual value to be put on the line. But for someone who's used to making compromises for the sake of expedience, even small sacrifices for the sake of principle are a necessary step in the right direction. Bottom line: You don't become a courageous or principled person over night. If you can't turn down a sandwich or change banks for the sake of sending an important message (or if you fail to see the reason for doing so), you have no chance of being able to step up when the stakes really matter.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by jalanlong » Fri Sep 18, 2020 9:03 am

Maddy wrote:
Fri Sep 18, 2020 7:12 am
There are literally hundreds of opportunities each day to push back against tyranny. Each one of them represents an opportunity to "man up" and exercise some backbone. Minor displays of principle that don't require much in the way of personal sacrifice are easy--and ordinarily less meaningful in overall impact than the ones that require something of actual value to be put on the line. But for someone who's used to making compromises for the sake of expedience, even small sacrifices for the sake of principle are a necessary step in the right direction. Bottom line: You don't become a courageous or principled person over night. If you can't turn down a sandwich or change banks for the sake of sending an important message (or if you fail to see the reason for doing so), you have no chance of being able to step up when the stakes really matter.
Maddy,

I always like your posts!!!
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by glennds » Fri Sep 18, 2020 9:18 am

You've asked an honest question, and here's one person's honest answer:

I think it's important to remain cognizant that in the US we have the right to an opinion and the right to disagree. In a healthy society, the disagreement between two parties should be civil and tolerated. As radical as it might sound, it should be possible to espouse different philosophies and still be friends, let alone do business together. Some would say the whole idea of opinion diversity is fundamental to democracy.

I personally think it is an indication of an unhealthy society when:
  • People cannot be friends or do business together if they hold different political views
  • When someone's differing political view to your own represents an existential threat to you
  • When people are pressured to choose a side, in other words neutrality is frowned upon. The failure to choose a side can result in differing levels of persecution.
  • People feel pressure to keep their views secret for fear of retribution if they made them known, even accidentally (outside of safe quarters).
  • It is difficult to find information (i.e. news) that is not presented in a way that overtly villianizes one side or the other. At a certain point of advanced dysfunction it becomes very difficult to know what to believe.
  • You begin to see increasing amounts of paranoia on one or both sides. For example, the other side represents more than just your less preferred option, they represent the end of civilization, or life as we know it, or "they're" coming for you to threaten your personal safety
If these various symptoms do not describe the society in which you would want to live, then consciously do your best not to perpetuate them. In your case, so long as the bank executive is not trying to force you to listen to his opinion and join his political point of view, then just continue to separate business from politics. Permit him to voice his political opinion and retain your right to form your own. The two do not have to be mutually exclusive. If his opinions bother you then choose not to follow him on social media.
What if you never did so in the first place and hence had no idea what his political views are?
Then the question you're raising wouldn't even have occurred to you.

It is easy to blame political leaders for everything, but when a society becomes unhealthy in the way I have described above, it is because the populace has chosen to adopt the behavior. These choices may have been unconscious, but the fact remains that widespread polarization, intolerance, judgmentalism, and simple absence of civility are collectively corrosive to any society.
Simonjester wrote:well said !!
Last edited by glennds on Fri Sep 18, 2020 11:16 am, edited 4 times in total.
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by vnatale » Fri Sep 18, 2020 10:24 am

Simonjester wrote:well said !!


Yes! EXTREMELY well said!!

Above provided by: Vinny, who always says: "I only regret that I have but one lap to give to my cats." AND "I'm a more-is-more person."
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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by Smith1776 » Fri Sep 18, 2020 3:51 pm

O0

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Re: When someone's opinion differs from yours...

Post by Smith1776 » Fri Sep 18, 2020 4:56 pm

Joking aside, I actually do care when the person I offend is on this forum because I actually care about this community.

If it's reddit I'm neutral. If it's the Knuckleheads forum I can't post anything without throwing shade on someone. It's pretty much a necessity. >:D
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